Rejection Reaction Poll

[j_cheney]

Several friends of mine have been having the blows coming in hard and heavy recently, so rejection hs been on my mind. We often can't predict how we'll feel when it hits. And needless to say, some people are better psychologically suited to handle rejection than others (which can be said about telemarketing, as well) and they deal with it more easily, letting it just slide off their backs (duck/water analogy there for anyone who missed it.)

So,
[Poll #1255972]

Any brilliant panaceas out there for wounded spirits?

Comments

[maryrobinette.livejournal.com]

I also save the rejections to papier mache into whatever project I'm working on. Why waste paper?

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

I love it!! Now we know what the dog's head is covered in ;o)

[reudaly.livejournal.com]

I rant for a short period of time, eat some ice cream, then send it back out. Occasionally I rewrite, but rarely and after SEVERAL rejects.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

My path is similar, only strewn with fig newtons.

[lisamantchev.livejournal.com]

I needed an option like this: feel smooshed with disappointment, indulge in something chocolatey, and send the story out to the next market.

A few years back, there would have been tears, too. And ranting. But not so much anymore.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Let me see if I can adjust the poll....BRB

[janni.livejournal.com]

More like a few days than one hour (and it can be longer if there's not a clear market), but the basic principle remains. I get a day or so to mope, then back out it goes.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

You are most wise (and self-controlled)!

[stonetable.livejournal.com]

Too bad this wasn't multiple choice!

I generally:
* Report to RA & Duotrope
* Print out the rejection and stick it to my bulletin board
* Resubmit the story within a day or two

I've been lucky to get some pretty specific feedback on a few stories. In those cases, if I strongly agree with the comments, I'll hold on to it for a little bit and make some revisions. Otherwise, back into the wild it goes.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

I have one that I got this week-end, but after some comments, I need to tweak a bit and do market research...so maybe Wednesday for that one. ;o)

[tatterdamelion.livejournal.com]

My last rejection gave me no option but to blink with incredulity. I believe it was the disparaging comment about it being "relentlessly depressing."

Um, it was kind of about the end of the world. It can't all be hugs and puppies. That particular rejection letter has been added to the file of "special" rejections.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

"relentlessly depressing" huh? Ow...

[pabba.livejournal.com]

I sigh a lot, both internally and outwardly.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

I recently got an editorial suggestion not to use the word 'sigh' in a certain spot becasue it was 'too emotional'...

I kind of think of it as an all-purpose reaction myself.

[aliettedb.livejournal.com]

I generally do several things, but it does depend on story/market. A really snarky rejection will have me complaining to whomever happens to be handy (usually the BF :) ), and consume some kind of comfort food (dry fruit/crisps/anything I can get my hands on).

I also take a sadistic pleasure in crumpling the rejection into the wastepaper basket (where it will be recycled into, er, something useful :) )

I'm a great believer in the "the more stories I have out, the fewer rejections I'll actually notice," so I do try to keep my stories out (this, alas, doesn't work for novels...)

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Yes, and the novels eat into the short story time, too...

I wish I could add the 'crumpling rejection' option to the poll. I like it!

[babarnett.livejournal.com]

I'm definitely a "varies as to story and market" gal. I almost always diligently report the response time, ship the story back out, then comfort myself in the evening with a glass of wine (oh, who am I kidding...I'd be drinking the wine anyway, rejection or not). My emotional reaction is what varies. It can be anywhere from shrug-it-off-and-move-on to general disappointment to cry-like-a-baby moments. Though one more Monday reject-a-thon like these last two I've had and cry-like-a-baby moments will become all too frequent.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

I think that a lot of the time, if my hopes had gotten inflated by an extended hold or something like that, it hurts worse when they boince on me. Others don't really bug me at all.

Yes, the reject-a-thons suck! No more, you hear me?

[will-couvillier.livejournal.com]

My reply was morose; hence, I just submit a hello!

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Any response acceptable ;o)
(within reason)

[rflong.livejournal.com]

My first reaction was "I can only pick one???"

In no particular order I

sulk, eat something extremely high in calories, find alcohol, find another market, write another letter/email, watch Bernard's rejection from Black Books about a million times http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JU4S2BIqoHY, eat more (pref high quality cheese), drink more, watch the cat leave in disgust, watch the cat return with a consiliatory bird he has killed for me, throw out the cat, send out the next query.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

The bird must really help ;o)

[amsaph.livejournal.com]

It really depends on so many factors, much of it not related to writing too. I might cry, like I did last week, or usually just mope and throw a pity party. After a few days, I try to get it out again, but I definitely can't write for a few days after any rejection, because I feel so worthless.

And it doesn't get easier with time. In fact, in my case, it's getting worse as time goes by.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

The worthless feeling really stinks. My passes pretty quickly, fortunately, but I think a lot of us do feel it.

[melissajm.livejournal.com]

Several of the above: Whimper, commiserate with the CL gang, report it to the RA log + SFF.net RA contest, and hunt for the next victim...er, market.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Good on ya!

[spcpthook.livejournal.com]

If it's hard copy it gets opened and filed in the appropriate place which varies depending on where I'm sitting when I open it. Floor of the car, trash can, manure pile whatever's closest. If it's email...that's what the delete button is for. As long as I already have a record of where it went to and how long it was out, there's no need to hold on to the reminders except in the rare instance where a personalized rejection makes me realize that me and that particular editor will never see eye to eye. Then I might hold onto it long enough to stew over what an idiot he/she is. Then it too hits the recycle bin and life goes on. I recently got one that sorely tempted me to post to at least my blog but took a breather and deleted like all the rest. Just noted to myself I'll never send there again. They have to be really out there to bother me and this one did.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Wise call on not posting about it. Editors always see those somehow....

[grayrose76.livejournal.com]

I think this poll needs to be multiple choice. I kvetch (either on my blog, with my writing group, or under my nose), eat something made of dough, look through the story in case it needs minor adjustments, and send it back out. There might be a time interval before the consumption of doughy goodness and hitting the send button again.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Mmmmm.....doughy goodness....

Unfortunately now I can't seem to change the poll.....perhaps tomorrow.

[time-shark.livejournal.com]

My reaction is directly proportional to how much hope I have that this or that particular piece might finally do the trick. I might mutter some colorful descriptive language under my breath.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

We were discussing this earlier....'directly proportional' is a particularly apt description for the level of disappointment.

[vaughan-stanger.livejournal.com]

A whole bunch from that list, but mostly I frown at the rejection email/letter, then consider whether there's something in it I can use, in which case I'll the piece. If not, sling it "out there" again.

No tears (yet), some navel-gazing, much ranting, usually to my critting angel. Oh, and report the R to ra_log.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

;o)

[ruralwriter.livejournal.com]

Mostly, I just shrug, although some of 'em get me down (particularly if I really-really like the story).

It depends on the nature of the rejection comments, too.

Once, I had a story rejected as not being "science fiction." My story took place on another moon of another planet far, far away and focused on a new science. The market made reference to my story by name...so I don't think they mixed it up with another one...but that left me scratching my head and wondering about subbing to that market again... I could understand not liking my story...but it not being science fiction???

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Go figure....depends on that editor's definition, I suppose.

[marshall-payne.livejournal.com]

some people are better psychologically suited to handle rejection than others (which can be said about telemarketing, as well)

Gee, how did you know? No, I believe we've chatted about this, J. I don't care for telemarketing very much, but it beats getting a "real" job, as I do it from home. I got about 30-something No's today. No story rejected yet. I actually like rejections. I mean of my ficton. Law of averages. Gotta get through the No's to get to the Yeses! Though last year when I went 100 rejects without a sale, that was a bit much. But the hot streak did finally come. ;o)

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

100? Wow, that's sticktuitiveness!

[brian-ohio.livejournal.com]

Lately its gotten to the point of giving it all up. I've set a deadline for which I will take a LONG break. 145 days left. If nothing happens by then...

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Hmmmm....at time, breaks are helpful. Just don't make it too long.

[alaneer.livejournal.com]

I do several of the things listed and then some. Cry like a baby, report to ralog, tell my writers group, send the story out withing a day, kick the chair, yell at the husband, ruin dinner. In the end, I promise myself to write better stories.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

;o) Yes, I should have chosen a different poll option...

[dandyfunk.livejournal.com]

I always try to make the next story better than the one I wrote before, so a rejection means I'm still working upward.

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Hmmmm....not emotional....

[asakiyume.livejournal.com]

OMG you already have 69 comments.

I get depressed, roam my house like a dinosaur, and find some market, any market, to try resubmitting the story to. Then I set about trying to write something new....

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

I'm trying to decide, is this roaming like a T-rex, roaring adn looking for something to devour? Or roaming like a Brachiosaurus?

[jmeadows.livejournal.com]

They used to hit me hard. I've gotten so many now, I just don't care. I log them in the appropriate spots (I seriously have to update two spreadsheets and a doc for each rejection I get, sigh), and plot who to attack next. Getting three or four in a row is still pretty hard, but at...pretty much any point of sending things out, I expect to get rejected. :)

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

Yes, the multiple-rejections-in-one-day is never fun, but inevitable at some point....

[orogeny.livejournal.com]

I still get emotional! Actually, it varies, depending on the rejection. If it's a story I'm proud of and have been told works, then something like a form rejection feels like a big step backward. Long holding times followed by rejection? Depression.

I don't drink and I'm on a diet, so I can't eat myself happy! (Although back in my bad-eating days, I'd easily do a bag of double-stuff Oreos.) Now I put the letter on my desk, have a long shower and wallow in a couple of hours of reality tv (or episodes of House, or whatever I'm Netflixing at the time) in my pajamas. The next day, when the pain is slightly less immediate, I make notes on my logs, update Duotrope, and put the letter in my binder. I send it out if there's another appropriate market.

I really wish I could get to the point where I didn't care. I guess that will come! Part of it's volume (maybe all of it). After I'm finished with my MFA, I'll go back to trying to pump out lots and lots of mediocre stories! =D (I'm still getting one or more a month finished, but the lack of revising time makes it sloooooooow getting them out the door.)

[j-cheney.livejournal.com]

THe long shower is a good idea, cleans off the dirt thrown on your heart and soul....

I agree about the long holding times. That's the worst. I have a couple that are over a year now, and if they get rejected, by is that gonna be bad!